butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
