best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
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