Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
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