Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize