(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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