3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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