White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
