Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
