apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
