OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
one two three fourrrrnication!
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
