elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize