yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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