my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
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