Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Randomize