with your own penis?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
