She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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