I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
