Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Randomize