To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
