it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
