But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
and she was petting her beer can
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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