Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
