He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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