i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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