Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
