Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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