omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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