No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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