Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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