I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
