my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
