lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
