One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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