He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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