arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
