U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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