ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
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