1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
