If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize