wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
