why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
