nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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