how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
