He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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