who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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