Walk of Shame. In a state park.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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