Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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