god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
