we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
