We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
